There are many maxims in life. Small contextual truths that hold true within certain confines.
One such maxim is as follows: If it a movie makes a lot of money, then it should have a sequel.
Michael Bay directed Transformers in 2007 and it made a lot of money.
THUS – Michael bay was asked to direct Transformers II in 2009 to make a lot more money.
And he did.
But Transformers II isn’t really about gigantic sentient robots who mire earth in a dire struggle for survival as they seek to find the resources necessary to power their precious energon cubes. Transformers II isn’t about Optimus vs. Megatron, good vs evil, the introduction of new characters, confusingly loud and yet still interesting CGI, or some half-baked plot about a robot called the Fallen that no one’s ever even heard of.
Transformers II is about Michael Bay, the Revenge of Michael Bay.
You see Michael Bay is a man, and like all men he could be considered both good and evil. Having made past “End of the World” movies like Independence Day and Armageddon, he understands that when big things come from the sky, humans get scared. He also understands that scared humans are especially patriotic around July 4th, particularly scared American humans, because they have some collective memory of an independence gained through combat that was well worth fighting for. In this way, simply by understanding our history, Michael Bay is smart.
So Michael Bay decided that the best way to live a good life and have stuff was to make movies about big, ominous, robo-alien things that may or may not cause mankind to cease to exist. Every movie he makes is the same movie, he just changes the actors and the title a wee bit so that he can make it again, and make more money. In this way also, Michael Bay is smart.
Hence my statement that Transformers II is not really about any of the things we as a viewing audience may think it is about, but rather it is a movie that portrays the real life saga of Michael Bay in terms of his revenge against all other movies that ever existed and took money out of his pocket. As stated before, Michael Bay can be considered both good and evil. He wants to be productive and creative and someone who makes things. This is good. He also wants to make the same thing, again and again and again, and expects his customers to pay for the old like it is new. This is bad.
If Michael Bay were a car manufacturer, let’s say he made Jeep Grand Cherokee’s, and he took one old Jeep Grand Cherokee from 1994 and every few years just painted it a different color, and then tried to sell it as a 1994, 1998, 2007, and 2009 vehicle. Each time claiming it was new and needed to be paid for. We would call him a crook and cheat, and we would no longer be interested in his product.
But Michael Bay does not make cars. He makes movies. Big, loud, scary, hopeful, July 4th type movies, that sucker in American audiences every time.
Transformers II is a movie that Michael Bay made. It made a lot of money. Michael Bay got his revenge.
In a few years Michael Bay will make another Tranformers movie. It will be the same movie he has always made, but he may call it a different name just to be sneaky. Many people will see this movie, and Michael Bay will make lots of money.
Michael Bay is smart. He knows that there are many maxims in life, and some maxims hold true.
